Salvation Through Cheese Balls

I was trying to be on hiatus with this thing, but once in a while you just come across something so special that you can't remain silent about it. For me, this usually happens in the dollar store. 

I was looking for some cheap / crappy snack food to enjoy while playing video games when I came across a bag of "Brim's Cheese Balls." The name "Brim" just stood out to me and I was impressed by its bright purple packaging. I grabbed the crinkly bag off the shelf and turned it over in my hands. I came to terms with the fact that I was standing in a Dollar Tree, attempting a serious contemplation of the quality of these cheese balls on a Friday night. I wondered what the point of my life was. It was then that I discovered this little gem:

That's right: it was scripture printed on a cheap bag of chips. 

This is especially wonderful to me because a couple of years ago I actually wrote a blog entry called
"Rap Snacks: The New Scriptures" and it was also about people modeling their lives and basing their morality around bags of chips. At the time I thought it was just ridiculous nonsense, but I now realize that it was prophecy. 

I am some kind of prophet. 

So there's not much for me to say about this image, other than, yes: it exists.

In a way I guess it makes sense. Who buys cheese balls at the Dollar Tree? To paraphrase Homer Simpson:

- Alcoholics
- The unemployable
- Angry loners

- Etc.

I guess these people do need Jesus in their lives, and what better way to introduce him than through cheese balls? Some might laugh at this attempt to mingle cheese balls with scripture, but perhaps it will help someone out there.

Thank you, Brim's brand cheese balls. 

Thank you.